Self-inflicted dreams.

I’m falling in love with a self-inflicted dream
Only to be disappointed by
How life is never what it truly seems.
Chances and encounters float by
A touch out of my reach
I wonder why I even try?
Let down by those that I love
To only hold hope
That someday I’ll rise above.
Above the false claims I once held dear
Above the expectations society bears.
Only to cling onto the fear
That brings me back into reality.

Encountering reality grounds me
Shaking me back from an oblivious state
Opening my eyes to what I should see
And feel what I should know.
Only to question if the feeling
Is just a moment in time, ready to go.

Anchor.

Sailing with no anchor
Lost somewhere in the depths of apathy
Floating above the endless opportunity
Moving along oceans of failure

Born into sporadic chase
With wind that carries the possibilities
Of one day finding what I was meant for

This is not how I imagined my future
In this vast world of diversity and intellectuals
The strongest willed
Racing far ahead of me
Finding their port of existence
Where I have none to call home
Where is that anchor?
Hold me down for once
Let me experience accomplishment
Keeping me still and constant
Against the moving tides of boredom
The potentials seem limitless

I long for the calmness of knowing who I am
Searching for the hidden talents that lie deep within me
Contrast from the attention deficit
Mind which spins in this twirling storm
Of wander lust
And unfinished journeys
So I’ve been traveling without an anchor
Sailing into the unknown horizon
Looking around for alternate routes
With no self-defining destination
To navigate towards

Meeting uselessness
Seeking uselessness
Stranded because I have no anchor

Nothing to settle me down
What is it that can hold me still
And let me experience accomplishment
So that I can have something to navigate towards
My anchor of concentration and focus
Hard work and determination
All the while fighting the rolling boredom
To find my place in this vast world
Call my own port,”Possibilities”
And reveal the talent inside of me
Letting me experience accomplishment
Keeping me still and constant
Against the moving tides of boredom
My anchor will let me see that the potentials are limitless